NOT HERE >>

I do know what makes me happy.
It’s the simplest things in life.
The most random moment that everybody misses.

Yes.
Being happy is something you want for yourself.
Being happy is having the self-satisfaction.
Being happy is having to do nothing but
to experience luxury.
I do want that to.
I want to have my own house.
My own house that I can do anything & everything in it.
I want all the money I can have.
I want to have the truest friends in the world.
I want to have a shapely well-furnished body.
I want everyone to like me.
But, that’s being too selfish. Isn’t it?
–
Though we are only human beings.
We laugh. We fall. We make mistakes & We want it all.
I know all of us have ups and downs and
the only thing that hold us up is desiring what
we want for ourselves.

But let me tell you that the simplest
things you actually see everyday
are the ones worth living for.

When you’re haggard looking, and you missed
the bus to school, and then you saw someone
that was actually experiencing the same as you.
Instead of ignoring him, why not give him a smile?
That hopeless person striving to have enough luck
might actually need that simple grin.. a smirk maybe. :))
Get me?

Instead of thinking what you’ll do for the following days..
Instead of pressuring and stressing yourself because of school work..
Instead of comparing yourself to someone..
Instead of thinking about yourself..
Why not have a glimpse of the world?

Look at the people passing by you.
Look at them.
Look at you.
Look at everyone else.
Just think of the world.
Think of all the simple things.
They are the most essential things a person,
before he dies, must actually recognize.
They are indeed, what makes a person happy.

REPOST FROM:
http://nevershatter.multiply.com/journal/item/18/WHAT_MAKES_YOU_HAPPY

June 13rd of 2007.

I woke up early this morning. I was excited. I am excited.
I had a very unusual BIG breakfast and prepared my clothes for the event.
Some of my fellow teen-ers may say, "I don’t want to go to school. I’m not ready yet." "I can’t get over of my summer." "I hate waking-up early!"

                Well, I already got a chance to torment my complaints of being a college girl. But today, and the past few days, I have been very busy preparing for my college year. And that amazes me why I even bother going to school when others would just open their mouth and just nag the people about it.

                To tell you honestly, I am having a wonderful time seating in my arm chair, listening to my professor’s remarks, and being in a room full of people. -people who have a passion for learning. I am one of them, or maybe, half of them are like me.

               Although I would miss my daily "couch-potato-shows", and will be unable to open my office [Photoshop] and make random arts as a past-time, I would never take advantage of the chance of being in a room, wherein you could meet and make friends with a lot of people and be the socialite that you want to be.

            It’s like entering a new trail. There will be failures, success, and dreaming. But to what truly lies in being a student, is to be able to learn something..at least something.

I feel so stupid right now. As if my movements have limits and if I exceed, I will explode. Disturbed. Anxious. I want to search for a little bliss.
–
I was walking rapidly while the rain is heavily pouring down. I wasn’t passive at that time. That’s what I remembered. She was there..behind me. And there was me, holding the object causing me to feel so stupid right now. I was holding the grudge though she didn’t notice because she’s so busy blaming me why that thing was in hiatus. Neither did I know because I wasn’t so sure how to handle it. I know I made a mistake. I did something wrong but that doesn’t make me feel so stupid at all. Everybody make mistakes, even dogs do. But the fact that she was there, reprimanding and blaming you for what happened, that will make you feel worthless and coward. That’s what I am feeling right at this moment.
–

Crying and feeling so hopeless.
Finding the right bliss at this point.

These are old memoirs I have and I don’t want to regret losing for the rest of my life. Just for the sake of keeping and sharing, I’ll post some of my quotable quotes and poems. Ok. So, I think these are the latest and honestly, I have lost most of them. That’s why I’ve realized just recently that I have to keep it somewhere that I won’t forget it’s there.
–
I LOVE SO

I remember my childhood years
You used to wipe my tears
When me and my friends fight
You always hug me tight

When I can’t sleep and all alone
You make me feel that I’m near home
Hugs and kisses all around
You never make me frown

You give me wisdom and care
in my mind it’ll always be there.
You taught me how to cope with struggles
And never give up in a hustle.

You’ve been also my friend
whom I can trust ’till the end
To you, I’ve learned to opened my heart
I wish we would never part.

I’m so happy to be with you
and all the things that I know.
All of these I owe
to my MOM that I love so.
–
(STILL NO TITLE)- please help me find the perfect one.

Things can’t be fair sometimes
Accidents may be too tragic
and you just see yourself cry at times
like a kid who can’t see magic.

You think life’s wasted
Your heart’s full of sorrow and grudge
like there’s full of queries in your head
and you can’t even hold it or touch.

Where as peace for some, they can see
and all the happiness and bliss in a rim
they’re like birds flying free
and with all of it they thank him.

You wish all of them can feel the pain
Wear a mask and die in stress
That the world will put you to gain
and forever feel the pain less.

But my friend, be gentle with yourself
Maybe what you need  is help
You have to let go of what you feel
because a wound takes time to heal.
–
CONMAN

Look at what’s in store for you
and believe in everything that you do.
Ignore the things that out you down
because everyone deserves a crown.

Be someone embedded in the Lands of the earth
Not someone who can be stepped at just like a dirt
Shout your name and be proud of yourself.
Insecurities, they will never be a help

Stand up for what you believe in
and face the world with a big grin
Be a conman ’cause that’s what we need
and now is the time for you to lead.
–
Random quotes I made for my planner:
"I want to define myself and to really know what’s my worth"
"I have friends and family that value me a lot. Since I want them to know
that I appreciate it, I’d take care of myself and be proud of who I am."
"I want be someone not somebody. I want the people to know that I exist."
"It’s not in your good grammar. It’s not in your perfect looks. It’s not in the way of walking in fashion. It’s what you want to share. Express yourself."
"In this world, less than 100% survive. One day, when you wake up and feeling dead, you’ve realized that you have a worth, that is, you’ll feel dead and yet survived."

I was fine just this morning. No sudden wake-ups. No rush. In fact, I even had a breakfast which I don’t normally do because I usually miss it. 7am to be exact. Not 11. Not 1. I even got a chance to smile.

Like a ferris wheel inside an amusement park. This day. This very moment. 5:34 PM. I’m having this awkward feeling again. I don’t know what is this called, but believe me, it makes you weak and would even let your tears fall from your eye as if you couldn’t gaze anymore. This is no drama for your fyi. This is animosity.

According to my memory, something happened before I felt this resentment.

She was sitting there, clicking the remote of the TV, searching the channel she wants to watch. Finding for the right timing. Before she even opened her mouth, I started visualizing what had happened before that very moment, because I know for sure, that ’sitting-flippin-the-channel’ thing –with me sitting too, I knew something will come up.

And so as I remember those vivid pictures of me and mom and the subject of our conversation, "that might be it." I thought to myself. And I never went wrong. Pondering was over. Now is her turn. "Tinext ko papa mo sa sobrang inis ko kanina. Sabi ko hayaan mo, balang araw di na kami mamamalimos sayo." Numb. That’s what I felt. I wasn’t shocked. I knew she would say that to him. I know her. I know them both. They’re my parents. But this one’s shocking. "Sumagot ba naman papa mo. Ang sabi nya, ‘Hayaan mo, pag natapos ko na din tong project ko manlilimos na din ako.’ Yang papa mo talaga di iniisip kung anong magiging epekto ng mga pinagagagawa niya."

–

I was.. I thought I could manage it. I am big enough. I am that ‘responsible big sister’ with my brother. But that’s what I thought.

I never wanted to actually see and be in this situation. God knows that. But people get tough sometimes when they experience such things. That was me. I have proved it. I know I have. But when things go hard on you and you can’t help it anymore, you start to burst and search for answers.. and questions everything.. everything that happened to you.

I could never believe in one story. I know that. But things become different when you try to see which side is supposed to be on the right place.. especially if both sides are the ones closest to your heart.

I was sitting on my desk, tearing up the excess paper in the pad in front of me. Well, I haven’t written something like prose since I graduate so I find it hard just to pick a topic and write something about it. But to reveal what I have written in this yellow pa paper during my time of thinking. I have rote things I had thought of, randomly. I chose which word I liked and just branched a new word out of it.
*FEELINGS

•     determined
•     excited
•     hatred/anger
•     love
•     happiness
•     disenchantment
•     fear

Alright. So I chose ‘determined’. For what reason? For me, It’s a word full of positive, striving, aiming feeling. I have realized something while I’m writing this "free-write" thing that I call. Someday, when I’m all educated and is ready-to-face-the-world girl, what will I be doing? Will I be doing something that I planned years ago, what I found something along that made me happy, or just a (mere) random person who still dreams of what will she be doing the coming years? I am 16. Some say, I’m just a kid. What I have planned for myself will still CHANGE. They even said, "Trust Us!"
So, maybe they’re right. Even though their way of saying that I’m still a kid. Who knows what will happen to you in the future? There are so may queries in our heads. People have plans and goals to achieve and I can really see some who are really striving hard to reach it. Others though, have very minimal plans for their own lives. Their motto? "Just go with the flow." But to me, if you’re happy with what you’re doing right now, and you make other people around you happy too, then go live your life! Every person, whether your motto is "Plan ahead." or"Go with the flow.", be determined not to waste the life God has given you. Some experiences may be regrettable, shallow, and a grudge, but still, it’s a part of your existence. Learn from it and just be happy that every single day is blessed by Him. Live your life to the fullest because 2nd-life is a hoax here on earth.

I grew up fast.
I did see the changes happening in my life and to others as well.
When my dad left us, I was and I am constantly evolving.
Life happens and eventually ends.
To see the world.. and have a taste of it somehow,
is a must for every living creature.
That is why we all have our own learning of life.

For me, there will always be theories.
Well, mathematically speaking, there is.
But to enter a life by any means, each of us has its own capacity of understanding
the existence of a being.

Let me share what a 16-year-old girl thinks.

-Whenever we hurt someone else,we would never be naive even if we’re pretending to be.
-Everyone has its ego.
-If you feel like one, you act like one.
-Pink is a unisex color.
-There will never be brainless person [not literally].
-There are two kinds of person: 1) one who is very determined to master a certain field. 2) one who loves to try out different kinds of field.
-It’s good to have good and bad experiences.
-Every person is genuine. authenticated, and unique.
-Even if we think that Chinese and Japanese have the same eyes, well, they don’t.
-There will always be temptations around.
-Star signs are sometimes true.
-What a person is experiencing now, will also experience by another person.
-We have different handwritings.
-You can do almost anything using the internet.
-There will never be a spark if only one person is striving to have one.

Share your theories too.

i feel like i was exiled.
harsh moving objects.
grief. anger.
all the hoax and lies,
they never banished.

i was feeling a little insanity.
my mind is moving.
rapid. huge. vast emotions.
i want to scream.
i want to cry and all the
tears pour beneath my
sighs.

i’ve never been better.
all the worse things
amidst everything i hold on to..
tranquil. peace.
and the end is war.

Yey! you opened my blog post.c=

Just want to let you know that I do not post my daily blog here.
I use Myspace for posting blogs.
So if you’re pretty interested in reading my blog posts..
visit this:
http://blog.myspace.com/pleiados
or better yet, check out my myspace account:
http://www.myspace.com/pleiados

Thanks for your time.c=

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Peace and love♥

DOS